New Year (Day) - 1/1/11

"The time is now." That statement can apply to many different situations, plans of action, thoughts and decisions. Right at this moment, it applies to my decision to stop everything and write this first blog entry of 2011. This is the first entry in a while and there is much to say, if it is assumed that anything I have to write is worth saying or reading. It may not be but I would implore you to read on anyway.

The plan is to write daily. Or, almost daily. I might even write more than once a day. What about? Oh, it could be anything. I love film and music as you might know and now that I'm living in NYC, I will be seeing my share of plays and musicals as well.

I live in NYC. That is the most unexpected occurrence of the most recent two months. As a kid, I would watch Letterman and Regis and Kathie Lee and long to be in the city. Now, I work for Bloom Avenue, a start-up and have relocated here. I did not dream that at the end of last year I would be in a new job and a new city (on the East Coast) but I am here and I am happy. This unexpected and almost spontaneous change in the holding pattern I was in has given me new life and I need to say again, I am happy.

Having just read Delivering Happiness by Zappos founder Tony Hsieh, I have a different perspective on happiness than I used to and also have a different perspective on customer service. This is so important and I have already reached back to some of the ideas in the past few days. I am grateful for Tony's book and also for the conversation I was allowed to eavesdrop on that let me find it. I am also grateful that I can feel happiness in such an uncharacteristically uninhibited way that I was able to read about it without rolling my eyes. I can also pass happiness along and fully intend to do so.

I cannot say that life is perfect. I miss my family and don't have much going on socially but I can see past these things and have plenty to do and a mind and heart that are more open to new and unplanned events than they have ever been before. I have met some cool people already; sharing a bottle of wine with a couple on their first date just because we all seemed to enjoy conversing and chatting with a total stranger over coffee because I was able to say hello. These are not unusual events where I am concerned but have been rare of late, until very recently when the weight of dismay with everything was lifted.

Let's talk Broadway. The blizzard of December 2010 caused me to miss a play I REALLY wanted to see but I am making up for it and catching it tomorrow, 1/2/2011. Today, I caught the matinee of Steven Sondheim's "A Little Night Music". I skipped this one last time I was in NYC and would have missed it altogether had it not been for a chance encounter with John Lithgow on the Subway. He recommended it. And, I am delighted that he did! I was scared to say anything when I recognized him but we ended up having a conversation that was lovely and I ended up seeing a great musical today.

Bernadette Peters and Elaine Stritch are closing out the show in just seven days so I was lucky to get the tip to see it when I did. Stritch is a legend and the performance was as described...legendary. Her lines were delivered flawlessly and it was a guaranteed laugh whenever she brought her wisdom and "advice" to the stage.

Peters is an actress that I do not think I've truly appreciated until now. That can be the case when one has only seen selected performances and then encounters an actress in a starring role on Broadway. I think I can only really name one Peters role which was in "The Jerk". I laugh to myself now thinking of that film but also know that there is much more to the actress than a film that was made over 25 years ago.
"Send in the Clowns" made me cry. Literally, I did not expect to cry at all, and I felt tears. There was a vulnerability and truth to her character that came out just then. An earlier speech by Henrik, the son of Peters' former lover referred to the "truth" as something all of the characters lacked. It was at this moment in the play that one truth was exposed.

It is the first day of 2011 and I have accomplished more than I did on most days in 2010 or even 2009.

Please visit often and I will too. Happy New Year. Smile about something today. It is not too late.

Next Year Baby

I end this year bitterly hopeful about the next. I could make a list of resolutions a mile long and then break every one of them because I'm sure there are many things in this life I should resolve to change. If I'm honest though, there are not that many things I need to change in order to achieve happiness or fulfillment.

Yes, I need to lose a few pounds but my weight hasn't plagued my soul. It has just prevented me from being hot or the best looking one in the room...she probably isn't that happy either. So, I want to get into better shape and if that means I lose weight and look better, awesome. That's resolution 1.

Yes, I need to be better with money and spend less on stupid things but I like those stupid things and money can't buy...
Still, I can be a bit more responsible with money. That's resolution 2.

Yes, I really should drink less. Coffee, whiskey, everything but water. Maybe I'll shoot for that one again. I dunno. I went for 5 months with no alcohol once and 3 months another time. It was a better life so I'll try again. I won't stop, but I'll slow down. That's resolution 3.

Those are simple enough resolutions to make...just to try to be better in those aspects. I read a lot now and will keep doing so. Overall it was a decent year and I can make next year even better.

The last resolution I'll make may seem strange but given the past few years, it makes perfect sense. It is to not be involved with anyone who is involved with someone else whether they are just dating, engaged or married. If I don't know initially then find out (which hopefully never happens again) I'll take loneliness and marry it before I compromise myself again. One lesson I've learned is that a great way to lose a friend is to make that friend into a lover. It took a while but friendship can never be regained. A lover can be an acquaintance and a casual one at that but not a friend.

I am afraid as I get out there and date that I'll be plagued with relationships that end in infidelity as some sort of karmic retribution from the universe. My fingers are crossed though and I'll take what I deserve if I deserve anything less than love. I know what I don't want now and think I know what I want too. I hope losing so far is enough and I am allowed to move on with a guilt that is punishment enough for the things I have done. Eventually it should all balance out on both ends though sadly so far the casualty has been me. That is resolution number 4.

As you make your resolutions or ignore the tradition, try to make each day a good one in 2008 and beyond.

A favorite artist of mine is Jamie Cullum and I enjoy the lyric below as it kind of sums up what I'd like to do this year and the above entry is a start:


Next year, things are gonna change
Gonna drink less beer, and start all over again
Gonna read more books, gonna keep up with the news
Gonna learn how to cook, spend less money on shoes
I’ll pay my bills on time,and file my mail away, everyday
Only drink the finest wine,and call my Gran every Sunday

Resolutions, baby they come and go
Will I do any of these things? The answers probably no
If there’s one thing I must do, despite my greatest fears
I’m gonna say to you, how I felt all of these years
Next Year
Next Year